SOUTH AFRICA - A POEM By Odimegwu Onwumere

I thought I'd share this passionate poem with you. It touched a deep part of my soul and got me thinking and wondering how Africa got here.

South Africa

These killings, bestialities, animosities

You show to your visitors

Are for ignorance.

Oh! South Africa,

A land stained with innocent bloods

Generations with all the soaps can’t clean.

You have created ills

With these odious killing competition.

You neglected to learn,

Failed to compete with your visitors,

Failed to acquire knowledge,

Failed to be hospitable.

Why?

Killing your visitors

Can never be a sacrifice

To redeem your ignorance.

Killing your visitors

Can never open paths

Of prosperity for you.

Killing your visitors

Can never generate ideas for you.

You have caused your bad luck

With these innocent bloods

That would continue

To cry from your soil

Till the end of time.

Oh! South Africa,

Sunshine and moon

Shall henceforth be your enemies

As you enviously take to killing

Your visitors as your foes

In lure of taking them as your friends

- Odimegwu Onwumere, Poet/Writer, Rivers State, Nigeria.

4th Time Lucky: The Myth Of Buhari’s Victory

Sometime in December 2014, just after General Muhammadu Buhari won the presidential ticket of the All Progressives Congress (APC), I wrote a piece titled ‘Buhari and the Magic Number 4’ in which I analyzed the significance of the number 4 in Nigeria’s President-elect, General Buhari’s 4th attempt at becoming the President.

I was just monitoring proceedings at the APC primaries and decided to look at the 'what ifs'. Then the magic number 4 hit me.

The year being 2014, Buhari won over 47% of the 7,214 accredited delegates, scoring 3,430 votes to beat all other aspirants.

Incidentally, all top 4 candidates in the APC primary election scored votes with the number 4 after all votes were counted: Buhari 3430, Kwankwaso 974, Atiku 954 and Okorocha 624.

The question on my mind, would General Muhammadu Buhari be 4th time lucky?

However, when the presidential election was shifted from February 14, I felt perhaps my permutations where just some coincidence that I took too seriously, as the new date; 28-3-2015 had nothing to do with the number ‘4’.

At that time, a part of me knew Nigeria was heading for a change. What I was not sure about was if it would be a change of leadership which the General’s political party, APC, was campaigning for, or a change of paradigm which Nigerians seemed to be embracing.

The election came and contrary to all expectation of crisis, it was peaceful. The collation process was probably the longest event Nigerians have ever had to follow so religiously. Somehow the number 4 started showing up again.

The collation dragged for so long with several annoying breaks declared by the INEC boss and this ensured that General Buhari’s declaration as winner came in April – the 4th month.

Actually, he was declared winner of the election at exactly 3:15am on April 1 – within the 4th hour in the 4th month of the year.

General Buhari, out of 14 presidential candidates, polled a total of 15,424,921 votes (with 4 emerging twice) to become Nigeria's 4th democratically elected President of the 4th Republic.

The battle is won and lost and Nigeria prepares for the swearing-in on May 29. Indeed General Muhammadu Buhari was 4th time lucky. 

My first attempt at mythology seems right but my greatest joy is that Nigerians stood together to choose a new leader in peace. This can only be divine.

The atmosphere across the country was too charged for anyone to truly believe that weeks after the 2015 general elections we would not be reporting death tolls across the country.

If the Nigerian people and the politicians do not grab this as the divine opportunity given by the Almighty to fix the country within the next 4 (FOUR) years, I fear the regrets will be 4 times more painful than whatever we have experienced in 4 decades.


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Religious Bigotry Redefined By The Church

Recently I went to church spotting a black jalabiya my wife bought for me on a trip to India. I wore it so proudly because I am a fan of Arab fashion. I say this proudly for the right reasons. They are elegant and yet not revealing, gorgeous yet comfortable.

Little did I know that the sight of me looking like a young Alhaji from Northern Nigeria - thanks partially to my dark skin - sent an entirely different message to my “brethren”.

Few days ago I was told that as a worker in the church I should watch my dressing! Hello!

I was told that as a Christian I must be conscious of the “fact” that by wearing Jalabiya, I was promoting Islam in the church and this would mislead others.

This was the most devastating nail on the coffin of religious tolerance which I always knew was dying in Nigeria.

My heart raced to my recent struggles with understanding Nigeria’s brand of politics that only focuses on religion, ethnic zoning, quota...etc without regards for values, competence, manifesto and capacity.

Since General Muhammadu Buhari became the presidential candidate of Nigeria’s main opposition party, the issue of religious insensitivity has come to the fore as reflected in the discussions leading to his possible selection of a fellow Muslim as vice presidential candidate.

The term ‘Muslim-Muslim ticket’ became very popular.

It didn’t matter if a Muslim like the outgoing Lagos State Governor, Raji Fashola, would help make an Intergrity-Competence ticket. Many Nigerians only saw the Muslim-Muslim ticket.

Well, now that he eventually settled for a Christian, a pastor to make things very “perfect” for the Christians, I guess suddenly all is well. Right?

I have a lot of respect for the eventual VP candidate, Professor Yemi Osinbajo, whose antecedents, I must say, qualify him as the type of quality leader Nigeria needs. However, I think it’s unfortunate that he is seen by many Nigerians more as a Redeem Pastor than as a world class technocrat that he is.

Being a Pastor in one of Africa’s biggest congregations, the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG) is the major reason many will vote for him and in any case, that was the same reason many voted the incumbent President, Goodluck Jonathan.

President Jonathan, though not a pastor, particularly played the religious game more than any President I have known in my adolescent to adult years.

With tens of media men in attendance, he would visit the headquarters of the same RCCG for the monthly ‘Holy Ghost Service’, to enjoy the public intercession and anointing of the General Overseer, Pastor Enoch Adeboye, whom I consider to be one of the most respected ministers of God in the world.

As much as I sometimes feel Mr President only honours his God with a special place in his life and mandate, one may be right to call his moves some high level 'famzing'.

Either ways you see it, the 'public church going' worked on us and that is why he keeps “doing it”.

At least Jonathan won the 2011 election with a landslide margin against the proudly Muslim Buhari, although I have never seen the retired General going about kneeling before Islamic clerics or publicizing his Jumat attendance. Not even during Sallah celebrations or towards any of the elections he had been part of.

Now, Buhari towards the 2015 elections – his fourth attempt at Presidency – has been labelled as the religious bigot trying to rule Nigeria at all cost in order to enforce Sharia all over the nation.

If there is any politician who has been the biggest beneficiary of this religious sentiment that has swallowed the issue based politics that Nigeria needs most, it’s been the Christian among the two contestants.

I am worried because we may never get the right leader if we tie leadership to religious sentiments. With my recent experience, I just cannot help saying we are overdoing it.

I am more worried for the Christians because they have been the worst victims of extremism and consequently the more scared of the two major religions. Sadly they are gradually becoming the same problem they dread.

Here I had been, pondering on the disaster disguised as religion, which has eaten deep into the

country and has battered all the dreams of our founding fathers, of a nation where peace and justice shall reign, them someone tells me he doesn’t wish to see anything associated to another religion in the church.

If this mindset is what the church is producing, then I wonder how God's kingdom would come on earth. I wonder how they would ever truly "pray for the peace of Jerusalem".

My people perish for the lack of knowledge, says the Holy Bible (Hosea 4:6) and it simply reminds me that many of Christians would miss heaven not because of popular sins like fornication, greed, adultery, anger, idolatry, slander...etc, but because of the lack of tolerance for the “sinner” or “unbeliever” that Jesus died for.

Wikipedia simply puts the jellabiya as a traditional Egyptian garment native to the Nile Valley. I want to believe whoever supplied the information knows better than I do.

So, I have a question, how did my brethren know that the linen robes that Jesus wore were not similar to the Jalabiya that I love to wear? Jesus NEVER wore suits, trousers, ties, collars and all the fashion items approved in the church today, and that is a fact.

I have thought of placing an order for four new jalabiyas. Now do I go ahead and damn the reactions or I should just conform “for peace sake”?

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Buhari And The Magic Number 4

The winner of the APC presidential ticket, General Muhammadu Buhari, makes his 4th attempt at becoming the Nigerian President.

The year being 2014, Buhari wins the presidential ticket of the All Progressives Congress, APC.

With 7,214 accredited delegates, Buhari scored 3,430 votes amounting to about 47% of the total possible votes.

I reckon that the top 4 aspirants in the primary election all scored votes with the number 4 after all votes were counted?

Buhari 3,430 - Kwankwaso 974 - Atiku 954 - Okorocha 624.

Going down history lane, General Muhammadu Buhari was born on December 17, 1942

He was the military ruler of Nigeria from December 31, 1983 to August 27, 1985, this means that he spent only the entire 1984 as the Nigerian Head of State.

Now he is attempting to become Nigeria's 4th democratically elected President in the 4th Republic.

Could General Muhammadu Buhari be 4th time lucky?

Your Smart Phone, Your Smart Future

Recently, I delivered a 3-hour presentation on 'New Media Content Development & Journalism' at the Lagos State University School of Communication.

Not only did we equip the students with online tools for employability, we also shared the 21st century Social Media Business opportunity.

This is a revolutionary social network business sweeping across the world and freshly launching on the African continent.

As a young Nigerian with a deep passion for the younger ones, I hadn't seen a more success-driven group of young people in recent time.

They embraced the possibilities of financial liberty, bombarding me with an avalanche of questions about how to do the big time legitimately and making the best of their smart phones to "google" every information provided... I was glad to let it all out, that is my purpose - SHARING.

Now, IMAGINE taking our Social Media Business Seminar to more students and young professionals. Imagine the number of young Africans who would be empowered by taking advantage of the continent's fast growing online community.

Thanks to China, because of the affordability of smart phones, the internet has now become accessible to millions of people across the world, especially in developing economies and that is where the opportunity is.

Research has shown that by the end of 2014, 65% of the world's primary personal computing devices will be smart phones.

By the year 2020, 80% of the adults on earth would own a smartphone.

NOW is the time to get on the train, to rule that future.

Let's get 2020 started HERE

Oral Sex: What's God Got To Do With It?

I have realized that some of the issues we ignore actually matter to us but we are just conformists who won't face our realities. Shame.

I have heard many people, especially young, engage in fierce debates on this topic but never seen a resolution, or a mutual agreement on the morality of oral sex.

For clarity, oral sex, according to the dictionary, is “sexual contact between the mouth and the genitals or anus; fellatio, cunnilingus, or anilingus.” 

I guess we are on the same page already... you may want to consult your dictionary for the definition of those last three words.

I would have thought that judging if oral sex is right or wrong should be subject to where you are coming from as an adult, as we all have different social and cultural backgrounds.

However, most arguments on this subject are usually tied around religion, faith or spirituality. Then I find myself asking several times; what has God got to do with our man-made sexual preferences? At least that was what I thought oral sex was.

I became curious about what my Bible or God had to say about 'fellatio' and its likes; especially since many marriages and relationships are ailing because someone wants a blow job and somebody can't give it.

Some have called it a demonic practice sold to the world by western perverts, but worthy of note is that while its easy for many people to condemn homosexuality using the biblical story of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, oral sex wasn't one of the sins recorded in this instance, according to Genesis 19.

Looking at this passage and other parts of the bible, could this absence of disapproval for oral sex mean an approval of it? Maybe I am too hasty!

Is there anyone; king or prophet, in the Bible who knew or spoke a lot about love and sex? Your guess is sure perfect – King Solomon. With 700 wives and 300 concubines, I don't think anyone knows better than this dude about sex and relationships.

Our book of romantic poetry, Songs of Solomon Chapter 8:2 reads; "I would cause thee to drink of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate."

The name pomegranate derives from medieval Latin pōmum "apple" and grānātum "seeded". So I would merge that and say “Apple-Seed”.

The presence of 'apple' in this only reminds me of its relations with love and sex, especially when I read that according to the Qur'an, pomegranates grow in the gardens of paradise (55:68) and the Qur'an also mentions it three times (6:99, 6:141, 55:68) as examples of good things God creates.

Songs of Solomon 4:16 again says; "Come, thou south; blow upon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits." 

Seriously? “My garden?”

Then the great poet known for his creative use of figurative expressions writes in Songs of Solomon 2:3; "...I sat down under HIS SHADOW with great delight, and HIS FRUIT was sweet to my taste."

Ladies seriously! What position could you possibly sit for you to be UNDER HIS SHADOW?

Well, I don't know much. These are just scholarly and theological materials from different sources and I simply put them together in pursuit of knowledge.

If you ask me what side of the argument I am, I would say who cares if you give your spouse a head, or if she gives you a blow job in return?

If the Bible is silent about it or would not clearly condemn it and our cultures are divided over it, is personal conviction then not the next to turn to? Should health and hygiene not be the next factor to consider?

Is mutual consent, then, not supposed to be the defining factor on whether you would give it or get it in return?

Uhm.... The problem is that sometimes I imagine if I would want to risk my face being under the skirt when the trumpet sounds.

Well... those are my thoughts, feel free to share yours!


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VIDEO: Sanusi Wants To Go Into Tomatoes and Vegetable Farming

Few hours after "losing" his job as the Governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria, Mr Sanusi Lamido Sanusi speaks to Channels Television in Lagos, Nigeria.

Human Classification Theory (2) - An Evening with Sanusi Lamido

Set in Lagos Nigeria, it was a dinner for the alumni of a great Nigerian institution, Kings College Lagos. It is no exaggeration that the school has produced some of the brightest and most successful brains in Nigeria as proven by the number of its ‘Old Boys’ who have been and are still in positions of authority in Nigeria at different levels in the public and private sector. So you can begin to imagine the caliber of people at this event.

There I was seated among few friends enjoying the evening of exotic wines, rich buffet, great music and networking with the crème de la crème young and old; then walked in one of the night’s special guests and vice-president of the KCOB, Mallam Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, Governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria and "custodian in chief" of the Nigerian economy. Tens of guests rose from their seats in honor of his arrival and as if embarrassed by the gesture, he immediately waved us to please sit and I thought "ok, humble man" albeit sarcastically.

Nothing changed with his arrival, the very relaxed atmosphere remained same except the amplified chit-chat, back slapping and hysteric laughter that reminds you only of your school days. Sanusi brought on the side of him that seemed truly him. Then it was time for his speech among few others which I had looked forward to. I was not disappointed, as it was another deep, yet unambiguous speech. The humor was on point and so was his time management which gives hope that one day Nigerian leaders will learn to make short and smart speeches.

My eyes were busy searching the whole garden for his Mopol (Mobile Police) or ‘men in black’ who in the name of security would slap and shove anyone who dared to offer him a handshake. Not seeing any of that did not make me feel it was not a scene waiting to be played. As he walked off the mini podium, I expected the moment to come as few people in the audience who were excited by the humorous crescendo of his speech would want to get closer with a handshake. I saw a glimpse of the man in black but I was not quite sure since he was dressed in mufti, a truly black one.

Back to his seat and it was time to mingle. I walked up to him and as we exchanged courtesies with calculated smiles, the man in black showed up again! The plan was to prevent me from doing so as I had seen him do to many young people as the event wound down but Mallam Sanusi’s reaction was swift. "What is it now?" He screamed at his bodyguard in a manner that seemed like he was wooing a lady and I thought again "na shout be that?" Almost falling into deep thoughts he cut short my journey with another outstretched arm for a warmer handshake as I engaged him in a chat.

As Mallam Sanusi Lamido and I shared thoughts on few issues amidst my admiration for his oratory skills and refusal to be shielded from the people, I remembered my New-York to Lagos flight experience and how similar this could be to it. I expected the same airport scenario to play out as soon as he steps out of the venue of that gathering of old school mates where he was expected and somehow morally mandated to make himself accessible to all. So out of curiosity I found myself a vantage position to watch his departure and short walk outside the venue. Of course I was not going to make myself the scapegoat this time, so as I discussed with a friend, I kept an eye on him and his small entourage but all I saw were zealous security operatives trying to impress a man bent on enjoying his freedom as a citizen. Even the ones who were on other duty posts within the quiet housing estate followed him to show this nauseating kind of loyalty which only the Nigerian Police can define.

Perhaps I should be right to say Mallam Sanusi Lamido has proven it that sometimes it is not the so-called rich and powerful that we should blame for this shameful scene that plays out every time politicians appear in public but their security operatives who are always desperate to establish their man-in-charge status. Many times it is the policemen behind who are power-drunk on behalf of the men in power. Looking back at the face of ‘Oga Madam’ as her SUV drove away that sunny afternoon at the Muritala Mohamed Airport, I get the feeling those policemen may have been too fast for her to stop but then I just saw how such excesses can be handled with one calm word from a man who was not willing to be misunderstood.

With these totally opposite scenarios, doing a comparative analysis of the different social attitudes displayed by people in the leadership of Nigeria will drive any intellectual crazy if at all he or she manages to survive the process. I will not take that risk; rather I will toe the line of asking the question, what kind of power do Nigerian politicians try to show when they cannot control those security operatives who work for them? Why are policemen working for our leaders and politicians usually the reckless and sometimes lawless?

I am yet to send Mallam Sanusi Lamido that email I promised to send. Why? Well…

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Human Classification Theory (1) – Nigeria is not America

Nigerian Embassy, New-York

It was winter in New-York; she had visited the city to attend a conference at the United Nations headquarters as a member of the Nigerian National Assembly. I was doing a little shopping in Manhattan after visits to the UN and Nigerian Embassy, then we met through a friend she knew from home who also happened to be my host. We became friends albeit she was older. Her amiable personality was extraordinary and she needed company as she found her way through the city anyways.

We later realized that we were going to be on the same flight to Lagos in few days. We discussed a lot about Nigeria and American politics as we rounded off our businesses using our friend’s car for those few cold days. My brother and I shared our views on government policies and she defended the system with a rare naked passion for Nigeria to be better. I bet anyone would get that same feeling of hope we had as I often thought “how I wish all Nigerian leaders can think like this”.

As we stood at the departure lounge for those final goodbyes and battled with her excess luggage which ended not posing her much problems since we claimed to be together and the total weight was ok when spread on three travelers, she kept repeating “Ejima we must stay in touch o, make una call me o”. Sure we would love to have such quality person as a friend, so I thought as the air of her status as a member of the House of Representative or tag as a federal lawmaker never showed up in her attitude, let alone our discussions.

In a reciprocally down-to-earth manner with our new friend we took over vacant seats on the half filled plane as we ate, drank some red wine, relaxed on combined seats and tried to enjoy the long flight to Lagos. Trust the air hostesses to allow us enjoy our liberty; they were used to Nigerians and our free spirited communal lifestyle. We spoke endlessly of how much we could learn from America and its leadership and how the UN summit had changed her view of leadership and social impact.

UN Headquarters, Manhattan NY

I was tired of the flight just 8 hours into it, so as the wave of heat finally blew at me on arrival, I felt it was truly ‘Welcome to Lagos’. One of those moments you wish baggage claim did not exist as I was eager to just get home to crash, then her missing luggage issue showed up. There we all were, running up and down the airport to get things sorted but we could only leave with a promise from the airline that she would be called as soon as her bag was found. In about one week we had shared different sides of life together and the idea of us being friends didn’t seem out of place AT ALL.

Stepping out to be received by family, the reality of the Nigerian class theory stared at me right in the face. Before we could say those final words, gun carrying mobile policemen showed up from the sun and shoved my brother and I roughly away from her with the base of their rifles in a manner that reminds you of the middle-east police versus masses riots. They shielded her into a waiting SUV driven off quickly as if trying to escape a rain of bullets. Everything happened so fast like in well directed Nollywood movies. I stood there shocked to my marrow! This remains my realest ‘Welcome to Lagos’ and never the sudden switch to a hot weather.

US Consulate, Lagos

As I write this I still cannot understand why they acted that way and how she could not manage to stop them immediately. I kept asking myself, what or who were they protecting her from? The same people she needed few seconds ago? What happened to those lessons of accessibility we learn from western leaders when we go abroad? How come they could not stop her from being subjected to extra search at the JF Kennedy Airport? Where were they when she begged common citizens for help when her bag was missing?

That afternoon I realized one of the most bitter truths I have ever had to deal with, it does not matter if the streets of New-York put us on the same level as equal legal non-immigrants; as far as our own country is concerned we are not equal citizens, neither are we equal human beings. Sadly, that is the Nigerian theory of human classification and the manner in which the message was delivered to me still hurts. Naturally in my heart she slowly changed from being ‘Aunty’ into Madam or maybe ‘Oga Madam’.

Follow Keni Akintoye on twitter: @keniknows

Armed Robbery 101

I came across this piece and I just could not help but share it here. It is indeed “food for thought”. Enjoy:

There was this robbery in Guangzhou, d robber shouted to everyone
"All don't move, money belongs to the state, life belongs to you". Everyone in the bank laid down quietly.
This is called "Mind Changing Concept --> Changing the conventional way of thinking".
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One lady lay on the table provocatively; the robber shouted at her "Please be civilized! This is a robbery and not a rape!"
This is called "Being Professional --> Focus only on what you are trained to do!"

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When the robbers got back, the younger robber (MBA trained) told the older robber (who is only primary school educated), "Big bro, let's count how much we got", the older robber rebutted and said, "You very stupid, so much money, how to count, simple Tonight's News on TV will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!"
This is called "Experience --> nowadays experience is more important than paper qualifications!"

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After the robbers left, the bank manager told the bank supervisor to call the police quickly. The supervisor says "Wait, wait wait, let's put the 8 million Dollars we embezzled into the amount the robbers robbed".
This is called "Swim with the tide --> converting an unfavorable situation to your advantage!"

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The supervisor says "It will be good if there is a robbery every month".
This is called "Killing Boredom --> Happiness is most important."

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The next day, TV news reported that 10 million Dollars was taken from the bank. The robbers counted and counted and counted, but they could only count 2 million Dollars.

The robbers were very angry and complained "We risked our lives and only took 2 million Dollars while the bank manager took 8 million Dollars with a snap of his fingers.

It looks like it is better to be educated than 2b a thief"

Now to me I think that last piece sums it up! Though funny it is so right, even if you choose to turn out bad, you still need education… ouch!

I love the happiness bit too (5th)! Whatever you do find happiness, seek the funny side of situations, learn to laugh and you will be better for it.